What I Wore – Clothing Swap

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Hi! I’m Giulia Rozzi, a very stylish fauxshionista. I came up with this great original never-been-done-before idea: post pics of me in my favorite outfit of the week! I hope my wardrobe inspires you as much as I have inspired me and myself.

This week I attended a clothing swap with a bunch of ladies. Clothing swaps are a great place to not only get some new old clothes but also boost your self-esteem by sabotaging the other women’s experience.

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Romper: Smith

Belt: Vintage, my mom’s

Pizza: part of the plot

I rocked my new silk romper to the soiree. Rompers are a cool comfy option for summer and great for when you want to get totally naked to pee. I brought a pizza so that the gals would eat it and feel too fat to take the nice designer tailored items and just grab at the ugly XL tees, thus leaving all the good shiz for moi.

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Shoes: Seychelles

These pretty lil’ turquoise suede kitten heels are one of the more comfortable shoes I own and they are currently on sale at UrbanOutfitters.com and they look extra sexy when your feet swell up from humid summer bloat.

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The gals all laid their unwanted items out on the floor and we all began snagging things we liked. Notice the one girl in the background raising a bottle of wine in a “wad up yo?!” sort of way. She was great because she was pouring everyone wine, and with everyone being drunk it was easier for me to convince them that some really ugly items were amazing so that I could discreetly grab all the good stuff. Dumb girls!

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As the night went on and the wine went in, I started styling the other girls. Since it is widely known that I am one of the most influential fashion icons ever to grace the planet, they were all thrilled to have someone of my style level doll them up. Little did they know I was dressing them up like morons– did they really think I was gonna help them look better than me when we headed to the bar? Ha! First I did up this gal in a t-shirt, no pants, white Puttin’ On The Ritz scarf, fedora get-up. I made sure to tuck her usually long lovely hair into the hat so that she looked like she was balding.  What an idiot.

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Then I styled this moron. I told her that dudes love super short chicks so we tied up her legs to make look like a toddler, hot right? Then I wrapped her up in a weird cloak thingy with a bow in her hair. She had a pretty hard time waddling to the bar with us so we ditched her somewhere in Union Square. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL x 1,000!

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By the end of the night, I was just as tipsy as the rest of the untrendy bunch. Note to self: never ever ever drink 3 glasses of Rose with no dinner. Luckily there were plenty of old sweaters in the clothing pile for me to vomit all over.

Happy swapping!

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